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What Happens When You Call a Woman “Hot”..

Writer's picture: barishkumar samantaroybarishkumar samantaroy



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I am lying in his bed, sprawled Marilynesque across the sheets. I want to stay in this moment. A naked moment.

But then he says the words that blur my nakedness into invisibility.

“You are so hot.”

Hot. The one word that makes my skin turn cold.

I take a deep breath, and my heart furls up like a scroll. I remember we have only been dating for four months. Of course, he only sees the casing and not the meat inside.

“Hot is not a compliment,” I tease. “Nothing in life stays hot. Even fire eventually turns into cold, lifeless ashes.”

He silences me with the look he always gives me when I am acting too philosophical. But the philosophers knew how to ignite passion.

Plutarch called the mind “a fire to be kindled.”

I want to burn brighter than hot.

It’s a Saturday night, and we are dancing at our favorite salsa club. He tells me again I look “hot.” I bristle and deflect with humor.

“Beautiful,” I can work with. But “hot” is beauty’s whorish sister.

Later in the evening, I am at the bar taking a break. A well-dressed man approaches me.

“I love how you dance,” He says. “I can tell by how you mirror your partner…you can read people.”

I thank him for the compliment, and the usual small talk follows. Then he smiles, raises his drink, and tells me to have a wonderful evening.

A woman knows when a man is hitting on her. He was not. This stranger simply told me what all women want to hear — I see you. I see your strength. And it’s in your mind, not in your body.

I later think — why can’t my boyfriend do that?

I decide to lead by example. I compliment him more. I tell him how much I love his big brain, what a good dancer he is, and how handsome he is. He continues only to tell me I am hot.

My humor begins to sprout teeth. I remind him that I have a brain too. But every “you are hot” compliment silences me more.


JaiHind.. 🇮🇳 JaiBharat,,

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