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🌅 India Rising
We meet people, some strangers, some friends, who bring out the best in us and splash a palette of colours in an otherwise black-and-white life. Who we are and what we become is not a one-man effort. Everyone in our lives holds a stake in turning us into the person we are. Their thoughts, their outlook on life and their passion burns beyond their own life. They leave pieces of themselves in us just as we do in them.
We are all the people we’ve met and all the people we’ve lost.We are all the exes that loved us and all the crushes that didn’t.We are all the people who are still in our lives and all the people who’ve left.
It’s a tragedy that love doesn’t reign every time.But it’s a bigger tragedy when we erase people from our lives and pretend like they don’t exist anymore.
We’ve always heard that we’re supposed to let someone go totally. That we’ll never heal if they’re still around. Heck, even I’ve said in The Act of Letting Go that when something has run its full course, it’s time for us to let it go. But I’ve realized that letting go doesn’t always mean forgetting a person or erasing them, because we cannot. Maybe it’s about preserving a place for them in our hearts.
Will erasing them destroy every piece of them that resides within us?Will removing them make us forget about everything they’ve taught us?Will we stop doing something we love because they were the ones who got us into it?No. So why make it harder for ourselves?
It’s heartbreaking to leave or to be left. The aching feeling when you learn that your love was unrequited love or that a shared moment with another person could not amount to anything more, leaves you feeling so empty and numb
One second you’re head over heels with them as they sit across the dinner table. Next thing you know, you’re wondering if that was the last moment you shared with them. If this was all there was to it.
It’s hard. We cry ourselves to sleep. We isolate and numb ourselves to everything because it hurts less when we care less. We assume that the natural course of action when you reject someone is to leave their life. And the expected way of handling rejection is to not have them in our lives.
So we let go of the people who deeply care about us because we think we are supposed to. We don’t text each other back because we don’t want to hurt or lead the other one. We delete pictures from our phones because we don’t want to be reminded of what once was.
Maybe this helps us move on. Maybe this is how we want to grieve their loss. Maybe this is the only way we know to heal.And that’s okay.
But we cannot keep losing people who care so deeply about us just because they are no longer interested in us. Strength is holding on to those people who make life worth living.
There’s something beautiful about getting over someone without having to lose them to do so.
It’s possible to have a new form of connection with them after we mourn the loss of what once was. It doesn’t have to be forced. It doesn’t have to work. But it’s possible. We could find ourselves sitting across the dinner table, once again, laughing at everything we’ve been through together and not holding any grudges.
It’s not going to be easy and there is always a part of us that may love them. But over time, it turns into a love that doesn't consume us. It turns into reciprocated respect — respect for playing the role we did in each other’s lives, respect for forgiving each other and moving forward, and respect for choosing to stay in each other’s lives.
There is something very rare about knowing someone that deeply. And if possible, effort should be put into keeping such people close. It might not always work out because this cannot be forced. Boundaries need to be respected and it can get too painful for one to handle. But if we can find it in our hearts to honour the love that once existed, we can forge a path towards a new evolution.
It’s these people who we’ve fallen in and out of love with who want what’s best for us. It’s these people who will continue to love you forever, maybe not in the way you want but in the way they know how to. They can continue to be your support system as your shared history with them can be a source of comfort and understanding.
Sometimes love doesn’t come in the form we want to. But it’s possible to find unconditional love later within the hearts of those who you once hurt/who hurt you.
I took a lot of time to come up with this one. This is a thought-provoking perspective that we rarely come across. I generally avoid talking about love and the pain associated with it but I couldn’t help myself this time.
What started as a simple thought drove me to write this entire piece in the hope that maybe it could help someone and myself to stop losing the people that matter in my life.
I don’t believe in removing someone from my life just because they don’t feel the same way about me or me about them. No end should be a bitter one.
If you admire the person, it doesn’t always have to be a romantic relationship. There are so many beautiful ways to connect with each other and they’re not less important.
JaiHind.. 🇮🇳 JaiBharat..
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